Rubies From My Valentine

It's my beloved's birthday, and he has been playing all day up at Angel Fire with the scouts, while CGP and I stayed home to walk the dogs, study and hold down the fort. And so, since the week was busy, and I did not do a Valentine's day post, I would belatedly pay tribute to the romance in our lives tonight.

Of course, Valentine's Day is not a Jewish holiday.
Strictly speaking, it is the feast day of a Christian saint.

But romance is romance, and love is love, and my Engineering Geek, like many geeks,

has a tender and romantic heart.

I will digress here to tell you two stories from our courtship--isn't that such a lovely word?--that will demonstrate my point.


First Story: Early in our courtship, Bruce took a trip to California to visit his brother and sister, and to have the unveiling for his parent's tombstone. While he was gone he called every day. The day after he was due to arrive home that weekend, I had a breakfast appointment with a good friend, and so I thought I would not see him until later. As P. and I were having breakfast, Bruce came into the cafe, carrying a red rose. He walked up to our table and announced: "I am looking for the love of my life." And then he handed me the rose. P. excused herself fairly quickly, and it was Bruce and I that had breakfast together.


Second Story: It was clear by the fall of 2001 that Bruce and I were heading for marriage, and I wondered how he would "pop the question." Rosh Hashannah went by, then Yom Kippur and...gornisht (nothing)! At the end of September, Bruce made a presentation to The Albuquerque Astronomy Society (TAAS) about the total solar eclipse he had observed in Zambia that summer. The day of the presentation, he was uncommonly nervous. He insisted that I sit in the front row "for moral support." I thought he was going on about not much, because he had been president of the society in years past. These were his friends and colleagues in stargazing after all! The presentation was great and was well received.



At the end, the president at the time, Eric, got up and said, "Well, if nobody has any further questions, then Bruce has a question about the Diamond Ring Effect." I was unsuspecting, thinking that it was the trivia question, because they had neglected to pass one out at the beginning of the meeting. And then, I realized that people were moving away from me, and taking out cameras. And then Bruce was kneeling in front of me, and presenting me with a beautiful diamond ring.


Oh! That "diamond ring effect!
I was speechless. I guess I said yes, because I am wearing the ring. Later, some of his friends told me that he had planned this ahead and called them. They were all a little worried about what would happen if I said "No." But he was undeterred.

So, as I was saying, my husband does have a strong romantic side to him.
And I get to see it every Valentine's day.
He likes flowery cards with sentimental messages.
The envelope is always labeled: "To My Dear Wife."
And I usually get chocolate and a dozen roses.

I am spoiled.

This year was different and especially nice.
On Valentine's day in the evening, I had a class to attend.
We did meet for dinner at Gyros Diner, with N., too.
I gave Bruce a card and a gift then.
By the time I came home, quite late, I had forgotten all about Valentines.

But my Beloved remembered.




There, on our dresser, was his usual beautiful card.
And a small box wrapped in red paper.

Inside, was a ruby necklace with matching earrings.

Beautiful.

And on Shabbat evening, he asked me to be sure to wear them to the table.

Just before the kiddush, as he does every week, he took my hand and said:

" 'Eishet chayil...A woman of valor, who can find? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and nothing shall he lack...Place before her the work of hands, for her deeds speak her praise.' " And then he said, "And I give you the rubies, 'for you surpass them all...' "

A woman of valor? That seems a little beyond me. But...

...you will pardon me, I am sure, for thinking I am the luckiest woman of them all.

Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Morning

This was one of those days in New Mexico.

A day on which if a person did not like the weather in the morning, by afternoon it was completely different.
We awoke to a snowy, foggy, gray and white morning.
So when the dogs and I went out for our morning walk, I decided to take the forest trail.






Originally, I had thought to go around the road to the meadow, but the path from the side of the house down the hill to the new road beckoned, and so we went.

I realized that I have taken many pictures of this path coming up, but few going down away from the house.

It's amazing how the same path looks so different depending on one's direction.


What a monochromatic morning. Gray sky and white snow with gray shadows. Slate colored bark on the trees, and gray-green branches of juniper and pinyon, broken only by the brown of scrub oak and the lighter straw of the grasses. It had a November feel.

Today was the also the second day of the Great Backyard Bird Count. Through the first part of the walk we saw only a few birds, this one perched high in a tree, and two in flight.

Later, we heard and saw more activity, as the morning drew on, and the fog lifted a bit, and the light, though still diffuse, grew stronger.

Today's count:

• Norther Flicker (Red-shafted)--2
• Stellar's Jay --5
• Western Scrub Jay--2
• Black-Capped Chickadee--2
• Dark-eyed Junco--2

Since it was a Shabbat morning, and we were footloose and fancy free, I decided to go farther up the mountain than I usually do. The forest trail, usually rocky and red-soiled, with dappled sunlight, was instead white covered, and the rocks were dark in contrast.

I kept thinking of Robert Frost's poem, Stopping By the Woods on a Snowy Evening, even though this was in truth a "snowy morning."

These woods are indeed lovely, dark and deep, but we were in no hurry to keep any promises this time. Instead of continuing up the mountain, when we came to a fork in the path, I decided to go down the Sedillo watershed, a small arroyo that only carries running water this high up when it rains.

After about ten minutes down the mountain, a dark form caught my eye, a mountain lion across the arroyo-bed leapt into the brush. I have never seen a mountain lion up here, and unfortunately, it was gone before I got my camera out. However, after proceeding a ways further on my side, the path entered the arroyo-bed, and there we found its track. The mountain lion registers the hindfeet into the track of the front feet, except here, where it slid just a bit on the ice. Since there was no sun, this is the best contrast I could get for a picture, but it makes the track deeper and wider than they looked in the snow of the pathway. Compared to coyote and dog tracks, these actually conveyed a sense of lightness, in the snow.

The dogs got very excited when we encountered the tracks--they had not seen the animal itself--and I imagine it was aware of our coming long before I saw it, and that is why it left the arroyo and crossed over to the other hillside. The jays were letting me know where it was, and they also were letting it know where we were. And when they saw the tracks, the dogs hair was up on their necks, and they did a good deal of silent but alert sniffing.

Soon, however, we came to the track that would take us back to the high meadow, along the new road and up the hill to home. We left the arroyo there, and so never found out where the tracks oringinated--probably somewhere farther down the mountain.

We had rambled for over an hour, enjoying the snow, and it was time for a leisurely Shabbat breakfast, some coffee and good book before the fire, as the fog and cloud continued to roll down the mountains.

It was warm and cozy in the house, dark and blustery outside. And

And it was nice while it lasted. By two-o-clock, the sun was out and the snow fast melting away.

Like they say here: If you don't like the weather, wait awhile. It will change.

Great Backyard Bird Count Day One

The first morning of the Great Backyard Bird Count did not dawn. The light incrementally increased through clouds and fog.

Here are our mountains as they looked this morning from the living room window. Tijeras Canyon and the valley are covered a fog below the peaks.

We did our observing while walking the dogs through the open space meadow behind our house, and on up to the high meadow above the new road.



The first animal signs we saw were not birds at all, but the deer tracks frozen into the mud on the meadow.

The deer have been out every evening and every morning, and the meadow paths and game-trails are just covered in deer prints, overlain by coyote tracks, deer and coyote scat, and even a few rabbit prints.

In the meadow we saw a two ravens riding the wind, hunting the meadow. They then went soaring away to the north, where we saw them settle on the road. They were probably breakfasting on road-kill or someone's carelessly put out trash bin.



Here is our first specimen perched at the top of a Rocky Mountain Juniper just outside the living room window. This one, like most in this range has red bars on his wings. I thought he was a dove until I saw the markings and the beak, because he looks so gray in the light we had this morning.











In the upper meadow, we saw two of these Southern Rocky Juncos. Although according to the species list, they are not called that any more. It is thought that all of the Juncos are the same species, and are divided by color. They are just called Dark-Eyed Juncos. These are the gray and slate variety seen in the southern Rockies and down here just south of them.




Our total count today was:

• Redtail Hawk--1
• Northern Flicker (red-shafted)--1
• Stellar's Jays--3
• Ravens--2
• Black-capped Chikadees--4
• Dark-eyed Juncos--gray-headed --2

It is supposed to snow tonight, so it will interesting to see what kinds of birds (if any) are out and about tomorrow.

A February Walk

Nearly Wordless Wednesday

Over at his blog, Deliberate Wanderer, Farmer Ernie sometimes posts a "Walk with Me Wednesday" series of pictures and descriptions. I think it is such a nice idea, that I am going to do the same about once a month for a Nearly Wordless Wednesday Post. So here is a February Walk.

In the cold of a snowy, February Dawn,
as the sun comes up over Los Pecos Ridge and One Pine Hill, come take a walk with me and Zoey and Lily.

Picture by Elisheva Levin, February 1, 2008.







Across the low meadow,

and towards the mountain

we wander, pausing to

sniff the cold air,

and investigate the deer tracks,

frozen in the snow.

Picture by Elisheva Levin, February 1, 2008

Up from the new road,
along steps of rock and roots,
we climb,
the crunch of the snow beneath our feet
the only sound in the still air.
Ahead, the rising sun is
just beginning to paint the high meadow
in golden light and long shadows.

Picture by Elisheva Levin, February 1, 2008.

When we climb into the high meadow,

the sun rises, too, ahead of us,

and we blink in the sudden lift of light.

As we turn to the west,

the Sandia fault block draws the eye,

as does the play of wind, light and

deep shadow on the meadow.

Picture by Elisheva Levin February 1, 2008

When we descend to go homeward,

the sun is hidden by the ridge once more,

and then we come through the woods

and up the the hill, in the shadows

of pinyon and juniper and scrub, laced with

moss and mistletoe.

Picture by Elisheva Levin, February 1, 2008

Home is a ahead,

and the turn of the earth is just bringing the sun

to peek above the ridge,

the porch and windows glow,

a beacon to us still under the hill in the pre-dawn.

Hot coffee and breakfast are waiting.

Picture by Elisheva Levin, February 1, 2008.

Accessing the Real "Real World": Homeschooling and the Special Education Child

Lately, as I have said, I've been thinking about certain issues in Special Education.




I have also been reading. Of course, I have been reading papers and books related to my courses, But I also picked up this book at the library.
It is The Well-Adjusted Child: The Social Benefits of Homeschooling by Rachel Gathercole. I highly recommend it to homeschoolers, particularly those who have confronted the dreaded "S" question from concerned friends and relatives, as well as curious or even hostile strangers. Gathercole puts a lot of these kinds of questions and objections in perspective.



As I was reading this book--in my spare time, as it were--I came across a section that brought another perspective on the issue of the special education child, one that also gelled some ill-formed thoughts that I had about the full inclusion ideology and some of the other assertions that go with it. One of these assertions is that there is really no such thing as disability. From the perspective of the Constructionists, Deconstructionists, and Postmodernists on the left in education, disability is socially constructed and therefore it can be 'deconstructed'--it can be made 'not real' because there is no objective reality to it.



In the midst of all my musing about this really amazing assertion--and it is amazing because the Postmodernists in Special Education are thus hell-bent on 'deconstructing' their own field--I was reading the Gathercole book and in a chapter called 'Independence and Strong Family Relationships,' I came across a section on the gifted or special needs child. Gathercole says:



"If labels ("problem," "gifted," "hyperactive," and the list goes on) were removed, many of these children would be described as bored, different, intelligent, creative, underappreciated, unsuited to the classroom environment, energetic, misunderstood, spirited, and so forth." (p. 93).



And I wondered, does Gathercole mean that mild to moderate disabilities and/or enhanced abilities (giftedness) do not really exist? Or are they a by-product of "the unnaturally restrictive and conformity-oriented setting of school" (p. 94)? Gathercole does not discuss this question. In fact, the question probably did not occur to her. Her point is that these children tend to do better when they are educated one-on-one by someone wholly invested in their development i.e. a parent.



As the parent of a child with disabilities, a child who has Aspergers Syndrome comorbid with Anxiety Disorder, and who has been schooled and is now being homeschooled, I have experience and perspective to comment on these questions. That "unnaturally restrictive and conformity-oriented setting" that is school was very hard on N. because of his disabilities. The constant interruptions, the noise, the pushing, the rudeness of some teachers towards him and others, the light, the stress of the hurry-up-and-wait, the endless homework, the regimentation,...need I go on? ...all of these things and more only served to increase his anxiety, his tics, and his sensory sensitivities. And the conformity...the expectation of conformity...the idea that everyone at a certain age should be able to do certain things and not do others...this created situations in which N. was punished for his disabilities. And his giftedness, which is quite pronounced, was not recognized or engaged. His interests, his passions, his ability to hyper-focus were, with a very few exceptions, not used as a starting point to scaffold to more learning for him.



Gathercole says: "Often "problem" behaviors disappear just by removing the child from school." (p. 94). And we found this to be true for some of N.'s behaviors. But of course the underlying special needs did not disappear. Rather, we saw an improvement in mood and anxiety, tics and sensory sensitivities because we were able to meet his need for order, quiet, frequent physical exercise, frequent small snacks, and fewer and well-planned transitions. The stress of the overwhelming social demands was removed because we separated his social contact times from the times he was expected to be focusing and concentrating on academic learning. This recognition of what Tony Attwood, a world-renowned expert on AS, calls the parallel curriculum, has done wonders for N.'s ability to engage socially. (What Attwood means is that in school, the kids are really learning on two tracks at once--the social and the academic--and due to the large numbers and rigid age-expectations, these tracks are stressful even for kids without disabilities. They are often a nightmare for kids who have significant neurological impairments).



Now, I have been told that by doing this, I am not preparing N. for the "real world." At first this objection from well-meaning, and not-so-well-meaning people confused me. I have since learned to ask them what they mean by the "real world." Adults who have the freedom to do so, naturally separate their social events from work, and work from study and introspection. They choose the timing and intensity of social interactions, alone-time, and time spent with family in intimate settings. They are not left to deal with bullying in "zero-tolerance" settings, nor are they blamed as a participant if they are the victim of an assault.



School children often do not have the luxury of these kinds of choices. They must deal with playground bullies on their own, and can be labeled as the "tattle-tale" or the "troublemaker" if they attempt to enlist adult help. In "zero-tolerance" settings, they can be blamed for being assaulted, defending themselves, or even being an innocent bystander in a situation they cannot escape. And woe to the child who has a neurological disability in such a not-the-real-world setting. My child, for example, "included" in a large, visually busy third-grade classroom, expect to conform to a narrow set of norms, was targeted by the teacher and then by certain students for bullying and humiliation. And there was no escape.



This is far from an isolated situation. Unfortunately. Several studies have shown that general education teachers feel unprepared to deal with special education needs and meet the every-narrowing standards required by NCLB. The "support" promised from special education teachers now in consultative role is either scattered due to large case-loads, or not sufficiently targeted because the support is ephemeral. Special education students in these settings are not receiving the focused, relentless direct instruction that the research shows is effective in developing their academic skills. And the special education students themselves perceive that they are a burden in the classroom, and they prefer being in a smaller, more specialized setting in order to get the leg-up they need in accessing the general curriculum. (The sources for this information can be found in Kavale and Mostert, 2004, The Positive Side of Special Education: Minimizing Its Fads, Fancies and Follies, Chapter 8: 'Ideology and Special Education').



And homeschooled special education kids? What is their experience with "the real world?" Like adults, when they are given the freedom to do so, they learn to regulate the time and intensity of social contacts so that they fit their unique needs. They learn to balance their social needs with their needs for alone-time, study and introspection. They have constant support and modeling from their parents and families when learning to deal with difficult people and situations. They receive the targeted, relentless direct instruction they need, one-on-one, and delivered by those who has the greatest interest of all in their development and future prospects, their parents. And they are out in the real "real world" all the time, interacting with people of different ages, learning from a wide variety of people in many different situations, all with the support of the people who care about them the most.



And in this real "real world," we just might see that there is more to the disability than the problem behaviors. Gathercole again:
"...these "different" children especially benefit from being in a more individualized environment with a caring individual who is genuinely interesting and invested in (their) well being and... individuality. Such a person can come to recognize...the challenges as the gifts they are so that the child may learn to use the gifts behind each challenge in a positive manner. When a parent can take the time to discover and understand these gifts, he has done the child a priceless service that will fortify (the child) for the rest of his life." (p. 93).



Yes, the disabilities are real. They pose significant challenges for special needs children and those that love them. But when the environment is changed to one more conducive for their learning and growth, behaviors become less difficult and easier to shape. Out here in the real "real world" of family and community and relationships, where authority is earned and the real differences between children are respected, the disability still exists, and still needs support, but we also find, as Gathercole says, that these special needs kids, "viewed as problem children in school, show themselves to be extremely creative, persistent, intelligent, and passionate when removed..." (p. 94).



My response to the "real world" objection has become another question: What "real world" do I choose for my own precious child? Personally, I choose the real "real world."

Honk If You Passed P-Chem!

This is our own resident 'Chemistry Geek.'

While she's whipping up a really good salad using spring greens, cranberries, walnuts, cherry tomatoes and mushrooms, she'll be chatting on about these really "huge ligand molecules with cobalt" that she's "doing columns" for in her independent lab study.

She will graduate this coming May with degrees in Chemistry (of course!) and History. An interesting combination, I know. But who knows where it will take her?

But last fall she worked hard to pass another milestone.

Physical Chemistry, known affectionately as P-Chem, is "calculus-chemistry hell, with physics thrown in." It is the most difficult course of the 'Chem' major for most students. Those in Chemistry have a little tradition of getting a bumpersticker when they successfully pass the course. Our 'Chemistry Geek Princess" passed--and more than passed--in December.

Naturally, we wanted to mark this special occasion.

Bruce had gotten a rain check for an A-OO-GA horn from his favorite tools and mechanical notions store. It finally came in a few weeks ago.

Last night, on the pretext of having some steaks in the freezer that just had to be eaten, and the fact that it was warm enough to melt the glacier so we could get out the back door to grill, we invited Chemistry Geek's boyfriend over to dinner. Of course, he was in on the secret. As Chemistry Geek and I cleared the table, the guys disappeared to the garage. They reappeared and placed a bin with the horn and car-battery charger in it under the table at their feet. I put out champagne glasses, champagne and a cheesecake, saying, "Well, we didn't drink this champagne on New Years and it's using up room in the 'fridge."

When we sat down to dessert, Bruce passed the CGP an envelope from Cafe Press. I had ordered something for her. When she opened it and read the bumper sticker, Bruce and the boyfriend took turns running the AH-OO-GA horn. I took pictures--of course!

The CGP was quite suprised as you can imagine.

She even consented to having the boyfriend install the horn into her car, and to having the bumper sticker on the bumper.

And of course, there was another present.

CGP is also a coffee drinker.

She has a T-shirt with the molecular formula for caffiene on it, with the legend "Better Living Through Chemistry." So we got her a coffee cup to take to her lab. It identifies her true nature.

Geek that she is, she was overjoyed!

And still very suprised.

And, naturally, we had to give her the reward that any schoolchild can tell you is important.

A Gold Star. The front of the card says:

"Congratulations! If you were in grade school, they'd give you a gold star."

It opens to say:

"Oh, what the heck! Here..."

The last semester of undergraduate studies can be trying. Graduation seems so close, but good study habits must be maintained to get to that big day. And there is the job search to focus on, too. And chemistry is not an easy major. In fact, CGP has told us that there are only six people graduating with the degree this spring. A little celebration of an accomplishment leading up to the goal seems warrented to add a little joy to a stressful semester.

And...what the heck! Any excuse for a party!

And if you happen to get behind a car that says "Honk If You've Passed P-Chem!" give the person inside a friendly little toot. Few people realize the work and commitment and sheer brains it takes to pass that course.

Socialization Semester: Archery, Black Belt Club and Other Activity

I haven't really reported in about how we are doing with the spring semester routine yet.

I have decided that homeschooling makes for busy lives, much driving and many more activities than when N. was in school.

And it's all good. At least it is now. Getting the routine worked out within the rhythm of waves of snowstorms has been difficult.


One new activity we have added is archery.
MLC's boss got N. a hunting bow for Hannukah, so when the holidays were safely past, and the weather cooperated, I finally took N. to the Archery Shoppe in town.
There he got the bow adjusted--these new compound bows are adjustable--and took a lesson.

He had earned an archery badge last year at summer camp using a recurve bow, but he had never worked with a compound bow before. So we thought a lesson was in order.

Now he goes to the range there about once a week to practice shooting. He is really dedicated to becoming an excellent archer, and is even talking about learning the bowyer's art, in order to make his own recurve.

Besides learning the art of archery, N. is also practicing his social skills at the range. There are some very serious rules there, and the older kids and adults give the younger kids tips on shooting as well. N., in turn, has been seen helping younger kids as well.


Since we only make it to the Archery Shoppe, about once a week, N. also set up his own target behind the house in order to get practice in every day. Here he is practicing with his BSA recurve.

He called the Tijeras Mercantile, "the Merc," to inquire about straw bales. He found out that whereas straw bales are only about four bucks for a two wire bale, hay is much more expensive. He found out that this is because the ranchers and horsemen use hay as feed, whereas straw is used for bedding as well as archery targets. He measured and figured that he'd need four bales, and then I drove him to 'the Merc' where he went in and paid for his bales and then, with the help of the proprietor, loaded them on the truck. The proprietor said to me, "Well, ma'am, this truck is too clean. You definitely need to mess it up some with the straw. Then folks'll know you are from the East Mountains." I laughed, and we kibbitzed a bit more before the man said, "Well, you've got a polite young man there. He came in and asked for what he wanted, and used his "pleases" and "thanks" and he even said 'yes, sir' and 'no sir' a couple times. You homeschool him?"

There are a lot of homeschoolers here in the East Mountains, and I was very pleased that N. was helping keep our reputation for good manners intact. Chalk another one up for good socialization and social skills. N. knows how to talk to adults quite well.


N. has been keeping up with his Taekwondo as well, although we've missed two Mondays and one Wednesday since the secular new year due to snowstorms. And, of course, we've also missed one day due to illness.

But N. make the commitment and joined the Black Belt Club. This club has many benefits. Firstly, we get two years membership for the price of one. N. got a dybok with his name embroidered on the lapel (is it a lapel?), and T-shirt that says "Just Taekwon-Do It!"

And he got a letter from the World Martial Arts Organization commending him for his dedication. It is important to learn to make and follow through on long-commitments. The nature of the belt system helps "young padawan's" do so, by providing plenty of intermediate rewards along the way.




N. also got a black belt with his name on it, to be awarded when he earns the rank of Black Belt, First Dan. Here he is with Master Blackman, holding his black belt briefly before giving it back.

In the meantime, it will hang on the wall in the Dojong, with the belts of the other members of the club. This will be a reminder of his goal.

He had received his Yellow Belt in December, after a hectic six weeks, and now is working on the requirements for the next belt.

He is going on Monday evening, Wednesday evening, and either Tuesday or Thursday evening.
It's a lot of driving. But on Monday he goes before Scouts, on Wednesday before Machon, and on Thursday, I take him to town before my late evening class, and Bruce picks him up at the library and then to Taekwondo. He likes those time because he has become good buddies with the five or six other people in his class. They range in age from 13 to 50.

And there is Boy Scouts. He missed the court of honor in September--it was at a campout on Yom Kippur. So he had to wait. They did not have one in December, so he will get his First Class in March, as well as the five merit badges he earned at camp, and the two he earned in the fall. There have been some social issues in the boy scouts, and N. has learned some valuable lessons. Like how to deal with anti-Semitism, how to behave well when others are not, and how to request help when problems arise. The anti-Semitism was in the form of teasing by two other boys, and would have been laughable in its ignorance if not for how hurtful it was for N. The boys and N. have learned some valuable lessons, and the troop went on to use the opportunity to teach some important life-lessons to all. And N. learned something as well--how to stand up for himself, how to talk to adults when such things happen, and how to show leadership, and now to maintain good manners at all times, even when others are not. He is learning to apply the Talmudic saying: "In a place where there are no menschen (human beings), you be a mensch (human being).

For N., this has been a lot of work and a lot of learning. Soon, though, he will receive the benefits he has earned for perservering in the face of difficulty, his rank advancement and his merit badges.

Finally, there is Machon. The situation is at least stable--I think--although the kids are all still being punished for the actions of a few. As I predicted, I made no inroads on the situation with my suggestions for positive behavior suppports. And to make matters worse, an important member of the faculty clearly does not know how to deal with kids and enters power struggles with them. This person is not going to go away. So we sat N. down and gave him a choice. He could stay or we could find another program for him, as we did last year. We talked about the fact that he had been born into this synagogue, and it was his, but that to stay he would have to learn how to respect this person's position even if he cannot respect the behavior.

And guess what? My son said, "I have friends there and this is my congregation. I have been here all my life and I am not going to let this problem run me off." I was very proud of him! What strides he has made in his social understanding since last year! So we talked to him about "keeping his head down and his powder dry" in class, saving his energy for free time, and "flying under the radar" with respect to this person. We talked to him about how to behave with respect for the "office" even if you don't respect the person. For example, I reminded him about how we always refer to the president of the US by his title and last name, even if we don't like his policies. The same applies in this situation. These are good social skills to learn, too. After all this will not be the last time he has to deal with difficult people in a situation he cannot or does not want to leave immediately.

When I reminded him about the president, he said, "I know! I know! I've heard you correct yourself when you are mad about Mr. Bush's policies."

You know, they hear every word you say, even when it appears they do not.
It was a small wake-up call to me.

So that's the news from Los Pecos.
Sometimes, I imagine that we are "carschooling" rather than homeschooling. And then I remember that in the mornings and early afternoons, N. works on math, does Kamana, reads avidly and becomes absorbed in his newest interests, archery and Empire Earth. "Mom," he'll say when he finishes working on cross-multiplication, "If you don't mind, I've got a civilization to build."

Mmmhmm. And he's becoming more and more civilized as well.

And the school people wonder about whether homeschoolers are socialized? I'd say we have more time for it than if he had to sit still and silent in a classroom most of the day, and do homework for hours each evening.

With the freedom to talk to and learn from people of many different ages, as well as learning to deal with many different settings and situations, and with a little advice from adults who love them, homeschoolers seem to become noticably well-adjusted people.