Academic Progress? Real-world Assessment

It's N.'s 13th birthday today!
N. is now starting his 14th trip around the sun and he is now responsible for his own sins--I am off the hook except as an advisor and Jewish Mother.
I, his mother, feel a lot better today than I did 13 years ago! It was a complicated pregnancy and they induced labor so it was a fast and hard ride! But I still remember the joy of greeting my newborn son.

I have been thinking that we have been so caught up in the Bar Mitzvah that we have not done "school" much lately. I was actually getting myself all worried that we are getting "behind." In this our first year of homeschooling, I am still learning to let go of the kind of school organization that one does teaching in an actual school. I think that transfering from the school world view to the homeschool world view may be harder on those of us who have formally taught in school.

So I sat down to write a list of what we have accomplished in the past three weeks:

• checked off the response cards for the Kiddush Luncheon against our guest list
• made hotel reservations for out-of-town guests
• made a list and script for N. to call people whom we want to honor with Aliyah (being called to bless Torah) and other honors.
• made arrangements to host a Shabbat dinner for our out-of-town guests at the hotel (picked menu, added prices, etc.)
• perfected the chanting of N.'s Torah portion from the scroll (no vowels or cantillation marks are in the scroll)
• read N.'s Torah portion for content and meaning
• discussed N.'s portion with the rabbi in order to develop an outline for N.'s D'var Torah (THE SPEECH)
• developed and fleshed out the outline for the D'var Torah (used the computer)
• Used the outline to write the speech (used the computer)
• edited for grammar, spelling, mechanics and content (used the computer)
• began practicing making a speech--gestures, cadence, tone, transitions, etc.
• began practicing chanting N.'s Haftarah
• read N.'s Haftarah for content and meaning
• researched current needs at the animal shelter (internet)
• planned a charity drive to make "take-home" baskets for 12 people who adopt animals at the animal shelter

These activities meet standards in Reading and Language Arts, Foreign Language, Music, Art, Public Performance, Math,Social Studies, Organizational Skills, Computers and Technology, and Community Service Learning. Even better, they meet the criteria for bringing the world into N.'s studies--because all the preparation is for a real event in which N. has to lead a service, give a D'var Torah, do a community service project and plan. Yes, he is being assisted in all of these areas--we call this teaching! According to all the evidence from Gifted Education--the real-world component is the most important for actual learning of skills. The social component is also involved. N. has had to interact with people of all ages by phone and in person. He is practicing social skills important to collaboration with others to accomplish a goal, and social skills that involve anticipating the needs and comfort of guests, as well as appropriate manners for greeting his well-wishers. He is also learning to use formal language and how to conduct himself in a formal setting.

And I will not need any tests to measure N.'s progress. The successful completion of the Bar Mitzvah Ceremony, the Kiddush Luncheon, and the family Shabbat Dinner on Friday and the family Havdalah and Seudah Shlishi (3rd meal) on Saturday evening will demonstrate N.'s progress without any doubts. This is alternative assessment that schools can only dream about!

I worry too much!

By the way, N. had graciously granted me permission to post his speech--after the Bar Mitzvah. He does not want me to steal his thunder.

Nine days until the Bar Mitzvah! (Breath, Elie, breath)!

It's snowing--again!

T'fillin: Binding and Unbinding

...But first, the before and after pictures
of the Hannukah Menorot.


To the right is the before picture. You can see the wax built up on them! It could take up to three hours to get this amount of wax off.

This picture to the right is the "after" picture.
(I did not have my husbands' antique Menorah in the "before" picture because I had already started cleaning it when we came up with the "Miracle of the Oil" solution. It is in this "after" picture, at the back). Don't they look marvelous? And it took about half the time that I have spent in the past. Call it "a miracle of mineral oil," call it "better living through chemistry," but definitely call it labor-saving.

Now, about T'fillin. They are called phylacteries in Greekified English. Or should that be Anglicized Greek? Anyway,T'fillin are leather boxes on straps that adult Jews bind on their head and arm when they pray. The boxes have compartments in them that contain small scrolls that have the Shema ("Hear, O Israel...) and V'ahavta ("You shall love Adonai your
G-d...) written on them. The scrolls are parchment and the verses are written by a scribe.
Here is N. donning his new T'fillin for the very first time in order to pray the morning service.
At his Bar Mitzvah, now less than two weeks away, he will proclaim himself responsible for the commandments as a Jew who can be counted in the minyan (quorum of 10 adult Jews needed to conduct a public service). In preparation for this, he is taking on the commandment of using T'fillin for weekday morning prayer.

Here is N. reciting the V'erastichli ("I will betroth you to me forever..."), while he winds the strap around his middle finger. Using T'fillin is symbolic of binding oneself to the commandments. It is a physical representation of the desire to bind oneself to G-d, Torah, and Israel through the fulfillment of commandments.

...But to me, watching N. bind the T'fillin has another meaning. It means that a phase of his learning is over. He is growing up and he has the knowledge and responsibility to take on certain obligations of his own choosing. More and more, in the coming months and years, my job as his mother will be to "unbind" him from me so that he can take on the commitments that will define him as a man and a Jew. His education will change, too, because more and more my direction or what will be learned will give way to the interests and passions that will lead him to his adult path. Part of me is "shepping naches" (rejoicing in the attainments of another) about his choice to lay T'fillin. Another part of me is hesitating on the edge of this new thing--my boy growing into a man. This part is hard for me as a mother. "Unbinding" my son from my control cannot be too sudden. He still will need direction and discipline for a while yet. But it must happen apace. I cannot stop him from growing up. In some ways, because I am his mother, N. and I have a destiny that is bound together forever. I will always be his mother. He will always be my son. But the nature of that bond is changing. He was my baby boy, but no longer. He was my "little guy," but no longer. And soon he will not be my boy. He will be my son, the man. Thank goodness I have a few more years to "grok" that one!