Socialization Semester: Archery, Black Belt Club and Other Activity

I haven't really reported in about how we are doing with the spring semester routine yet.

I have decided that homeschooling makes for busy lives, much driving and many more activities than when N. was in school.

And it's all good. At least it is now. Getting the routine worked out within the rhythm of waves of snowstorms has been difficult.


One new activity we have added is archery.
MLC's boss got N. a hunting bow for Hannukah, so when the holidays were safely past, and the weather cooperated, I finally took N. to the Archery Shoppe in town.
There he got the bow adjusted--these new compound bows are adjustable--and took a lesson.

He had earned an archery badge last year at summer camp using a recurve bow, but he had never worked with a compound bow before. So we thought a lesson was in order.

Now he goes to the range there about once a week to practice shooting. He is really dedicated to becoming an excellent archer, and is even talking about learning the bowyer's art, in order to make his own recurve.

Besides learning the art of archery, N. is also practicing his social skills at the range. There are some very serious rules there, and the older kids and adults give the younger kids tips on shooting as well. N., in turn, has been seen helping younger kids as well.


Since we only make it to the Archery Shoppe, about once a week, N. also set up his own target behind the house in order to get practice in every day. Here he is practicing with his BSA recurve.

He called the Tijeras Mercantile, "the Merc," to inquire about straw bales. He found out that whereas straw bales are only about four bucks for a two wire bale, hay is much more expensive. He found out that this is because the ranchers and horsemen use hay as feed, whereas straw is used for bedding as well as archery targets. He measured and figured that he'd need four bales, and then I drove him to 'the Merc' where he went in and paid for his bales and then, with the help of the proprietor, loaded them on the truck. The proprietor said to me, "Well, ma'am, this truck is too clean. You definitely need to mess it up some with the straw. Then folks'll know you are from the East Mountains." I laughed, and we kibbitzed a bit more before the man said, "Well, you've got a polite young man there. He came in and asked for what he wanted, and used his "pleases" and "thanks" and he even said 'yes, sir' and 'no sir' a couple times. You homeschool him?"

There are a lot of homeschoolers here in the East Mountains, and I was very pleased that N. was helping keep our reputation for good manners intact. Chalk another one up for good socialization and social skills. N. knows how to talk to adults quite well.


N. has been keeping up with his Taekwondo as well, although we've missed two Mondays and one Wednesday since the secular new year due to snowstorms. And, of course, we've also missed one day due to illness.

But N. make the commitment and joined the Black Belt Club. This club has many benefits. Firstly, we get two years membership for the price of one. N. got a dybok with his name embroidered on the lapel (is it a lapel?), and T-shirt that says "Just Taekwon-Do It!"

And he got a letter from the World Martial Arts Organization commending him for his dedication. It is important to learn to make and follow through on long-commitments. The nature of the belt system helps "young padawan's" do so, by providing plenty of intermediate rewards along the way.




N. also got a black belt with his name on it, to be awarded when he earns the rank of Black Belt, First Dan. Here he is with Master Blackman, holding his black belt briefly before giving it back.

In the meantime, it will hang on the wall in the Dojong, with the belts of the other members of the club. This will be a reminder of his goal.

He had received his Yellow Belt in December, after a hectic six weeks, and now is working on the requirements for the next belt.

He is going on Monday evening, Wednesday evening, and either Tuesday or Thursday evening.
It's a lot of driving. But on Monday he goes before Scouts, on Wednesday before Machon, and on Thursday, I take him to town before my late evening class, and Bruce picks him up at the library and then to Taekwondo. He likes those time because he has become good buddies with the five or six other people in his class. They range in age from 13 to 50.

And there is Boy Scouts. He missed the court of honor in September--it was at a campout on Yom Kippur. So he had to wait. They did not have one in December, so he will get his First Class in March, as well as the five merit badges he earned at camp, and the two he earned in the fall. There have been some social issues in the boy scouts, and N. has learned some valuable lessons. Like how to deal with anti-Semitism, how to behave well when others are not, and how to request help when problems arise. The anti-Semitism was in the form of teasing by two other boys, and would have been laughable in its ignorance if not for how hurtful it was for N. The boys and N. have learned some valuable lessons, and the troop went on to use the opportunity to teach some important life-lessons to all. And N. learned something as well--how to stand up for himself, how to talk to adults when such things happen, and how to show leadership, and now to maintain good manners at all times, even when others are not. He is learning to apply the Talmudic saying: "In a place where there are no menschen (human beings), you be a mensch (human being).

For N., this has been a lot of work and a lot of learning. Soon, though, he will receive the benefits he has earned for perservering in the face of difficulty, his rank advancement and his merit badges.

Finally, there is Machon. The situation is at least stable--I think--although the kids are all still being punished for the actions of a few. As I predicted, I made no inroads on the situation with my suggestions for positive behavior suppports. And to make matters worse, an important member of the faculty clearly does not know how to deal with kids and enters power struggles with them. This person is not going to go away. So we sat N. down and gave him a choice. He could stay or we could find another program for him, as we did last year. We talked about the fact that he had been born into this synagogue, and it was his, but that to stay he would have to learn how to respect this person's position even if he cannot respect the behavior.

And guess what? My son said, "I have friends there and this is my congregation. I have been here all my life and I am not going to let this problem run me off." I was very proud of him! What strides he has made in his social understanding since last year! So we talked to him about "keeping his head down and his powder dry" in class, saving his energy for free time, and "flying under the radar" with respect to this person. We talked to him about how to behave with respect for the "office" even if you don't respect the person. For example, I reminded him about how we always refer to the president of the US by his title and last name, even if we don't like his policies. The same applies in this situation. These are good social skills to learn, too. After all this will not be the last time he has to deal with difficult people in a situation he cannot or does not want to leave immediately.

When I reminded him about the president, he said, "I know! I know! I've heard you correct yourself when you are mad about Mr. Bush's policies."

You know, they hear every word you say, even when it appears they do not.
It was a small wake-up call to me.

So that's the news from Los Pecos.
Sometimes, I imagine that we are "carschooling" rather than homeschooling. And then I remember that in the mornings and early afternoons, N. works on math, does Kamana, reads avidly and becomes absorbed in his newest interests, archery and Empire Earth. "Mom," he'll say when he finishes working on cross-multiplication, "If you don't mind, I've got a civilization to build."

Mmmhmm. And he's becoming more and more civilized as well.

And the school people wonder about whether homeschoolers are socialized? I'd say we have more time for it than if he had to sit still and silent in a classroom most of the day, and do homework for hours each evening.

With the freedom to talk to and learn from people of many different ages, as well as learning to deal with many different settings and situations, and with a little advice from adults who love them, homeschoolers seem to become noticably well-adjusted people.